FIFA have issued an official report on the incident in the Burlington Hotel involving Israeli goalkeeper Dudu.

"As the Israeli players and officials were walking through the lobby area of the hotel, an Irish 'fan' threw ice at goalkeeper Dudu. The ice did not hit him and landed about five feet away. Dudu fell to the ground holding his face and rolled around on the carpet for about six or seven minutes. Four ambulances were immediately despatched from St James's Hospital where staff were put on alert".

"As Dudu was given treatment by two doctors who were dining in the restuarant at the time, the Greek referee Another Cheatingopolus showed red cards to three barmen and yellow cards to two waiters who were in the vicinity of the incident. The concierge escaped without a caution".

"Dudu recovered eventually but went down again when he missed the first step on the stairs. The Hotel Manager received his marching orders for that one. He then tried the lift but the lift door closed too quickly catching his nose again and down he went. Cheatingopolus looked around but couldnt find anyone to send off. When fully recovered Dudu was seen dancing (and diving) the night away in Anabels nightclub. We hope he didnt meet any rugby fans".